GWAR, best known for being over the top, extremely sarcastic, and always outspoken, took a few minutes to speak with us at a headlining show in Pontiac, Michigan. Warned by my escort that more often than not, the interview never goes as planned, we spoke with lead singer Blothar and lead guitarist Pustulus Maximus before they took the stage to see what to expect from them in the near future, and their thoughts on playing the Warped Tour this year.

 

Thanks for taking the time to talk with us.

Pustulus Maximus: Thanks for taking the time to bust out some cocaine.

Blothar: That’s right, thanks for taking the time to take the time to take the time.

Pustulus: I don’t have the time to rock out myself so if you would do me that service and do whatever it is you do.

 

Alright, 30 years, 13 albums and more members in the lineup than you can count on all your limbs. What keeps the machine running?

Blothar: Drugs! Drugs and alcohol mainly.

Pustulus: Ya… and surprisingly a very small amount of money. Like, not a lot!

Blothar: But gigantic egos!

Pustulus: No, I think you’re wrong about the egos, because I seriously think the greatest thing about me, Pustulus Maximus, lead guitar player of GWAR, the greatest thing about me is that I don’t even have an ego at all. Like not at all, whatsoever. So just take that how you want it.

Blothar: You see what I’m dealing with right?

 

So, last year, it was announced that you are in the process of starting a new album, but were hindered by Pokémon Go, is there anything you can tell us about that?

Pustulus: About the new album?

 

Yeah, not Pokemon Go!

Pustulus: Not about Pokémon Go. Pokémon sucks.

Blothar: Jesus Christ is actually the producer for this album. He came down from Heaven, which doesn’t exist by the way. So, he came down, he doesn’t exist, and heaven doesn’t exist. But he came down from that imaginary place to guide us through the process of making a record. We have done all of the tracking, and it sounds fucking great.

Pustulus: It does, really!

Blothar: You can’t hear it! Humans can’t hear it. It’s beyond – all of its recorded in a range that is beyond human hearing.

Pustulus: And I’m not even concerned about that, because it matters to us as artists that it’s a brilliant masterpiece. NOT that people can enjoy it. That’s not why we create. No! That’s not why you have babies, or build them. So, OTHER people can enjoy them? No, so you can use them, for your own pleasure and benefit.

Blothar: No, but Jesus does take his job seriously as producer. I mean, we have a lot of songs making fun of him, and he had to suck it up for himself and make the song great. Which is not easy to do, especially when you’re US. And, you’re writing negative songs about Jesus.

Pustulus: You know, that’s just a magical formula of winning!

Blothar: But it is nonstop hits man, I mean it’s really gonna wake some people up to the magical possibilities. They’re all hits. Even though we only created 11, I’m pretty sure there’s 16 or 17 strong hits on that record.

 

Any ETA on when we can expect the new album?

Pustulus: Maybe two or three days from now… I mean, what day is it?

Blothar:  This fall. It’s coming this fall.

Pustulus: I’m not even gonna masturbate until it comes out.

 

You guys are heading out on Warped Tour this year. They’ve included you guys, Alestorm, Hatebreed, and a lot heavier bands. How do you feel about the shift in genre being represented?

Pusutlus: Did you say Halestorm?

 

No, I said Alestorm.

Pustulus: Oh, not much better. What do they got? A bunch of songs about drinking grog from tankards? Ooh, I bet it’s great! That’s fucking awesome. Do they wear kilts? Are they from Europe of something? I mean, did Amon Amarth take all the good shit? They probably did because they’re the only good one.

Blothar: In outer space, GWAR is a boy band. So, it really kind of works for us. To be out there with a bunch of weird looking emo kids. I mean, I can’t think of any group of people that’s more deserving of going to a GWAR concert and having their teeth ripped out of their fucking skulls.

Pustulus: Hey! Put a little side note. Alestorm, I’ll get drunk with you, and smoke some drugs. Don’t take it all personally! I don’t like anybody. Don’t get butthurt. I’m only making fun of you.

Blothar: Because your name is stupid.

 

You come out after the show, the tour bus is gone. There’s an iPod on the ground with only one album on it that you get to listen to while you walk to the next city. What do you pick?

Blothar: Judas Priest, Rocka Rolla. The worst Judas Priest album.

Pustulus: Worse than Turbo?

Blothar: Turbo’s great!

 

Is there anything you’d like to shamelessly plug?

Blothar: I’d like to shamelessly plug your ass with my hideous bouquet of penises.

Pustulus: And I’ll hold you down so you can’t say shit about it.