After the success of the off-Broadway play Rock of Ages came word that they’d be making a film version. The trailer for the Tom Cruise and Russell Brand-starring flick has leaked and wow, does it look awful. The movie, directed by Adam Shankman (Hairspray, which should give you an idea of where this is going) takes the’80s hair metal Sunset Strip backdrop of the play and wallows in cliche after cliche. Alec Baldwin, as manager of the Bourbon Room (not to be confused with the Whiskey a Go Go – see what they did there?), looks ridiculous as a long-haired club manager. It looks like there’s going to be plenty of choreographed dancing, not just on the stage, and then there’s the music. It’s not like “We’re Not Gonna Take It” and “Pour Some Sugar On Me” are classics that can’t be messed with, but the songs just sound like they’re being sung by a bored glee club. In all, it might be campy fun, but more likely, it’s going to be a gaudy mess that makes Rock Star look like The Godfather by comparison.

Bram Teitelman

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