Just as Freak Puke hits shelves and online music stores today, The Melvins have announced an absolutely excruciating (freakishly nauseating?) tour schedule. On September 5th, 2012, the Melvins Lite lineup of Buzz Osborne, Dale Crover and Trevor Dunn plan to kick off a tour that will crown them the fastest band ever to play all 50 states and the District of Columbia.
“We figured it was time for us to do something REALLY crazy,” says Osborne. “51 shows in 50 states, plus 1 in D.C., and all in 51 days? Geez! I wonder if we can do it!!”
In a whiplash-inducing 7 weeks, the most grueling tour ever attempted will whisk them from Anchorage, Alaska across the four corners of the continental United States, and spit them out in Honolulu, Hawaii in late October. If they are successful, they will hold the Guinness Book World Record for the fastest U.S. tour ever played. Not only that, but in the near 30-year history of “the loudest band on earth,” this tour will be the first time The Melvins have ever played Delaware, New Hampshire, Alaska, or Hawaii. No matter what state you live in, you’ll get a chance to see the band – just don’t be surprised if they seem a little tired. Dates are after the jump.
September 5 Anchorage, AK Bear Tooth Theatre and Pub
September 6 Seattle, WA Showbox at The Market
September 7 Oregon TBA
September 8 Boise, ID Neurolux Lounge
September 9 Missoula, MT Top Hat Lounge
September 10 Salt Lake City, UT Club Sound
September 11 Casper, WY TBA
September 12 Denver, CO Bluebird Theatre
September 13 Lawrence, KS The Bottleneck
September 14 Columbia, MO The Blue Note
September 15 Omaha, NE The Waiting Room
September 16 Des Moines, IA House of Bricks
September 17 Sioux Falls, SD The Vault
September 18 Fargo, ND The Aquarium
September 19 Minneapolis, MN Grumpy’s
September 20 Madison, WI High Noon Saloon
September 21 Chicago, IL Double Door
September 22 Indianapolis, IN The Vogue Theatre
September 23 Louisville, KY The Vernon Club
September 24 Detroit, MI Smalls
September 25 Cleveland, OH Grog Shop
September 26 Morgantown, WV 123 Pleasant Street
September 27 Jermyn, PA Eleanor Rigby’s
September 28 South Burlington, VT Higher Ground
September 29 Dover, NH Dover Brickhouse
September 30 Portland, ME Asylum
October 1 Boston, MA Paradise Rock Club
October 2 Pawtucket, RI The Met Cafe
October 3 New Haven, CT Toad’s Place
October 4 Brooklyn, NY Music Hall of Williamsburg
October 5 Hoboken, NJ Maxwell’s
October 6 Wilmington, DE Mojo 13
October 7 Baltimore, MD Ottobar
October 8 Washington, DC Black Cat
October 9 Charlottesville, VA Jefferson Theatre
October 10 Carrboro, NC Cat’s Cradle
October 11 Knoxville, TN The Square Room
October 12 Greenville, SC The Handle Bar
October 13 Athens, GA 40 Watt Club
October 14 Birmingham, AL Bottle Tree
October 15 Pensacola, FL Vinyl Music Hall
October 16 Jackson, MS Duling Hall
October 17 Little Rock, AR Juanita’s Cantina
October 18 Baton Rouge, LA Spanish Moon
October 19 Austin, TX Mohawk
October 20 Norman, OK Opolis Production
October 21 Albuquerque, NM Launchpad
October 22 Phoenix, AZ Crescent Ballroom
October 23 Las Vegas, NV Artifice
October 24 Los Angeles, CA Hollywood Forever Cemetery
October 25 Honolulu, HI The Republik