Canadian hardcore band Counterparts recently announced that their drummer, Kelly Bilan, was no longer in the band. At the time, there was no explanation given for his departure. Last week, however, Bilan’s ex-girlfriend provided a statement in support of the band stating that he was fired from the band after she pressed charges against him for domestic violence. Lambgoat has published the statement, which reads as follows:
“I’d like everyone to be made aware of why my relationship with Kelly Bilan ended. Although realistically it should have ended a year ago, like most victims of abuse I romanticized my abuser. This isn’t a cry for attention, but rather a warning to other innocent women, and a demonstration of solidarity for victims of domestic abuse. I believed he would get better and that he loved me and didn’t want to hurt me. Over the course of our relationship he belittled my friends, my family, my career, me. He constantly had something to say about my clothing making me self conscious and trying to convince me that every man was just trying to sleep with me. Drove away all my male friends by insisting they never cared for me, that they only wanted to sleep with me. He made me feel inferior to him. He would cheat on me constantly, sneaking around so much that no one even knew he was doing this, and would emotionally abuse me calling me every awful name when he was mad at me. Would push me, barricade me in our home when I would try to leave, lunge at me as if he was going to assault me. But still always gaslighting me and manipulating me into thinking it was all my fault. The last time I saw Kelly Bilan will be the last time I ever see him. I pressed charges on him for assault after a disagreement struck a nerve and he pushed me face down then proceeded to choke me so hard I couldn’t breathe, leaving me with marks along my neck.
“I have been very thankful for the support I’ve received from my friends and family and for everyone who’s stepped up and shown what amazing friends they are. I want to thank Brendan and the rest of Counterparts for being such advocates against domestic violence, they were just as surprised by this behaviour as I was. I’m thankful to have met and be able to call Counterparts my friends, and will continue to support them wholeheartedly.”
Good for Counterparts is Bilan’s ex’s statement is accurate. Maybe her statement will provide an opportunity for others in abusive relationships to take action. as well. The band are currently on tour with Parkway Drive and We Came as Romans.