It’s been almost a year since Five Finger Death Punch’s Ivan Moody had an onstage meltdown which turned out to be a result from his struggle with addiction. Things seem to be looking up for the group since then, especially with their new album And Justice For None to be released on May 18th along with an extensive North American spring/summer tour. While the group are currently getting ready for all of this excitement to begin, bassist Chris Kael confessed to his personal demons on social media. The bassist admitted that he’s been struggling with addiction, mainly alcohol and cocaine, and has been sober for two months.
He shared the following:
“I’ve gotten away from sharing incredibly personal things here on the social networks. Even now, I’m not entirely comfortable opening up and telling this story. However, I woke up today to the universe telling me I needed to take a break from journaling and get part of my story on Twitter out to you. To help. To be that positive spark to someone, somewhere out there who needed these words as much as I needed to write them. I’m sharing the peace that I’m currently comfortably sharing. I continue to write in hopes that someday all of this will someday be available for you to read. I appreciate your own personal stories; but, for me, it’s important to stay positive and at arm’s length as I work through this.
Having the break from work from December through April gave me a chance for some true introspection. Introspection revealing that some of the things I was doing were absolutely no longer working for me. I got hit HARD with depression combined with drinking and cocaine that had definitely gotten the best of me. I hit an incredibly depressing low in February, realized that things were no longer in my control, gave myself to the universe and sought help in rehab here in Vegas. I covered the story pretty extensively on Twitter this morning; so feel free to check it out there if you are so inclined.
I look forward to traveling the world with @ffdp again beginning in April. I have a whole new appreciation for the job of which I’ve been given. I thank them for sticking by me as I went through all I had to go through to finally man up and seek help on my own.
I also thank my wife of 17 years. She has silently and bravely dealt with far more than what would have crushed any other woman. Her loyalty, patience, TRUE love and resolve are unmatched by any other woman I’ve ever known. She is strong and has never broken. I am thankful for her far more than any social media post can convey.
I look forward to discovering new intent and purpose in this job as I continue this journey forward. Clear and sober. Thanks to any of you who took the time to read this. With any luck, a spark has now been lit in one of you to take that step forward. You can do it.”
“Sober for 57 days. I do this for solely for myself. A great by product is to also show to any of you struggling that you too can do it. Lack of sleep has REALLY been an issue causing me some anxiety for about the last 30 days. It’s almost like my body is subconsciously prepping my body for the upcoming road schedule! Slept from 5 am to 1pm today. At least I slept! Thankful for a job that allows me the time to get this sleep under control and closer to a regular schedule.#HappyEaster #ShitYesSon #Delirious#SoberAsFuck”
Second. But, longest I’ve gone since trying. Feeling really good about this one. https://t.co/vMeuidBYWk
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
I always forget anything I write can end up as a story. I don’t regret spilling my guts on this one. My hope is that this may help someone afraid of taking that first step and give them that little extra push to get it done. My friend Greg helped me. Maybe I too can help now. https://t.co/HFnypY8Xpd
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
I look forward to traveling the world with @ffdp again beginning in April. I have a whole new appreciation for the job of which I’ve been given. And, I look forward to discovering new intent and purpose in this job as I continue this forward. Clear and sober. #ShitYesSon
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
I’ve shared the peace that I’m comfortable sharing currently. I continue to write in hopes that someday that it all is available for you to read. I appreciate your own personal stories; but, for me, it’s important to stay positive and at arm’s length as I work through this.
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
Thanks for letting me share today. I woke up to the universe telling me I needed to take a break from journaling and get part of my story out to you. To help. To be that positive spark to someone, somewhere out there who needed these words as much as I needed to write them…
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
The thing is, I became SO isolated in the last months/years of my addiction. Even today, I’m struggling being comfortable integrating again. It’ll come back as I’m quite the social motherfucker. But, it is taking me a bit to get comfortable there again. https://t.co/GFeXq0FucE
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
Been there too! Not to mention driving home after catching a show in Vegas and seeing the number of drunks on the road. I used to be that guy. Often on a bike! With @Uber so readily available, there is absolutely NO excuse to drive impaired in 2018. https://t.co/7tCqxOJjKU
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
She has silently and bravely dealt with far more than what would have crushed any other woman. Her loyalty, patience, TRUE love and resolve are unmatched by any other woman I’ve ever known. She is strong and has never broken. I am thankful far more than any Tweet can convey. https://t.co/v6yYGC5rBD
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
I’ve tried it ALL. Luckily, actually slept pretty good three ties this week. Hoping my body is coming around. https://t.co/RWdNST9AFK
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
I’m good for right now. I’m giving it back to those who think they’re alone and powerless. You’re not. I don’t want to talk about it to strangers outside of the written form; but, I feel it’s a story that needs to be told and can help. https://t.co/QZwQFRnhfT
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
I was defintely chasing death slowly through abusing substances. Feeling much better now after stepping away from it. I’ll spill it all in hard cover eventually. For now, my only goal is to let those going through shit that you’ve just gotta give it to the universe. https://t.co/lmxmruTqmW
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
It’s something I’ve dealt with for many years. Never really to the depth that the other abuses brought me; but, it’s always been there waiting for me to drop my guard. It ALWAYS gets better. Just gotta get through it to realize it. https://t.co/aQvLYVSrPU
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
Oh she played a major role for sure. Had she not busted me trying to restock after burning through $1300 in blow in two days in late January, I truly believe that I would not be here today. I was PISSED initially; but, thankful now knowing she was the one person who truly cared. https://t.co/YdmDrHIoYo
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
Haven’t actively shopped it yet. Waiting on presenting it to the bosses for approval. It’s my story; but, I’m not here to ruffe feathers. Just want to share my story in hopes of helping. And, obviously collecting a fat advance. @CoreyTaylorRock https://t.co/vM4Li1uRPW
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
My only plan is to have no plan currently. Taking it day by day and getting more work done and progressing more than I have in years. https://t.co/Lh52kYk3pl
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018
GREAT part of the book. I was quite pleased with that section. https://t.co/BAtxGmuRky
— Chris Kael (@5FDPChrisKael) April 2, 2018