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In just about one month (August 26), Melbourne, Australia’s Twelve Foot Ninja will be dropping their sophomore album, Outlier. The band have made pretty great strides in the United States with 2014’s Silent Machine, but they’ve got plenty of love for the city that spawned them. Vocalist Nik “”Kin” Etik ran down some of the things he loves about the city. Scroll down to check out the lyric video for “Invincible,” which was released just last week, and you can pre-order Outlier here.

Melbourne is a beautiful city. Known affectionately as Hellbourne, or Hellspawn to some, I know it as home.  There are so many things to do and see in Hellspawn, that you would require a few lifetimes up your spiked gauntlet, to take it all in.

For the nomadic wasteland wanderer, Melbourne has a myriad of dark lane-ways, and alleys to discover, playing host to magnificent pieces from some of the world’s greatest street artists, and haunted by the ghosts of now-deceased, tagged over burners. Places like, AC/DC Lane, Union Lane, Hosier Lane, Blender Lane, Croft Alley, and Rutledge Lane are where it’s at, to name a few. A friend of mine, and talented artist, Shane Sterry, proposed to his now-wife in Hosier Lane. Knowing that he couldn’t win her over with good looks, or razor sharp wit alone, he made a piece for her to convey his intentions. Luckily she said yes, or it would have been fucking awkward.

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For the crowd-surfing, culinary adventurer, embark on a steel python (train) at Flinders Street Station, and travel up the B(H)elgrave Line, to the very metal suburb of Camberw(h)ell, and enjoy an intimate, peak-hour, on-board crowd surfing experience. Melbournians love crowd surfers, and will greet you with hatred, and looks of indignation, before throwing you out of the train doors. Perfect.

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Disembark, and venture down Bourke Rd to one of my favorite restaurants, Italy 1, and experience one of Head Demon Chef Darren Venn’s culinary masterpieces, befitting of the King of Hell himself, Liberace. The Duck Ragu, Sage & Pancetta Risotto is particularly worthy of a fallen one. As far as good food in Melbourne is concerned, we’re pretty spoiled for choice .

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Or for those metalheads who are actively social, search for Pokémon at Melbourne Magistrates Court Pokéstop. All trainers are welcome, and rumor has it that there is a Legendary 666CP Fukyutu in one of the court rooms. Gotta catch a $20,000 fine!

My favorite venue would be The Forum. With it’s exterior Moorish Revival architecture, internal Greco-Roman aesthetics, and twilight-sky ceiling, it’s truly a beautiful place.  It was a cinema before it became a music venue. My grandma went there to see Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5. I have caught some memorable shows there, including Meshuggah, Opeth, The Drones, DJ Shadow, and Snarky Puppy.

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We are blessed with good metal bands in Melbourne. Some of my favorites (too many to mention), either current or deceased are Circles, I, Valiance, Boris The Blade, King Parrot, Jack the Stripper, Five Star Prison Cell, Damaged (from Ballarat, just outside of Melbourne), Christbait, The Berzerker, Blood Duster, and the most brutal band to come out of Melbourne, Pseudo Echo (haha).

 

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Bram Teitelman