We wrestled with our consciences about writing about this, especially in the early stages of the story, but now that there’s been somewhat of a resolution, we’ll address it. Earlier this week, a woman from Idaho accused Gaza vocalist Jon Parkin of sexual assault. Tumblr user amindfullofyou posted a disturbing and detailed account about hanging out with Parkin, in which they wound up (platonically) falling asleep in her bed. She allegedly woke up several hours later to find him “thrusting inside” of her. She pushed him away, and said “you can’t just start shit with people who are asleep.” He apparently cowered over her asking what she was accusing him and she “deescelated the situation” by telling him to go back to sleep.
For his part, Parkin vehemently denied that anything happened. “Throwing this sort of accusation up on the internet is reckless and completely slanderous,” he commented on the band’s Facebook, saying he has friends that have been raped. “Rape infuriates me, and I never see red like I do when I hear about it. This is not a subject or an accusation I take lightly. Anyone who knows me personally knows that I could never and would never force myself on anybody.”
Today, the accuser took down her post, saying “both parties have mutually agreed on a resolution for this matter. I have agreed to delete all mentions and posts about this incident from my blog, and I will refrain from posting about this incident again.” It should be noted that while she deleted the post, she’s not saying that the alleged assault didn’t happen. “Neither of us are retracting our respective statements— instead we are deciding to not discuss it further and move on.” She also apologizes to the band and those involved with their career.
There’s no real good ending to this story. Both the accuser and Parkin are the only ones that really know what happened that night. If she “cried rape,” that doesn’t make her much less reprehensible than Parkin if he actually did sexually assault her. At least the events of the last couple days have brought situations like this to the spotlight, and if it stops either a date rape from occurring or a woman from wrongfully accusing someone of rape, then that’s the best thing that could come of this. With both Parkin and his accuser deciding to not speak further of this, neither will we.